Precocious Preteens and Pie

So, my youngest is my day sleeper, has been all his 9 years. He sleeps on the couch even when he had his own room. He wakes up around midnight and goes to bed around 11 AM. Thank heavens we are homeschooling!

Anyway, this morning at 12:30AM he wakes and is bright eyed and bushy-tailed. He gets on the computer to do his work and around 1 I get him something to eat. Around 2 AM, he decides to come ask for pie. The following is our conversation:

Dan: Mom, do we have any pie?

Me: um… I think there’s a frozen one in the freezer in the garage.

Dan: ok

He runs off and is gone for a while, my mind dulling from lack of sleep. He comes back and looks worried.

Dan: Mom…

Me: What’s up buddy?

Dan: Um… can we have pie?

Me: grumbling “You want me to make pie at 3 am?”

Dan: You’re not doing anything else, are you?

Remember, I’m laying in bed, snuggled under my warm covers at 3 AM.

Me: Nah, I’m just counting bedbugs, nothing important.

Dan: YAY! As  he runs off again

Grumbling, I walk out, get the pie from the freezer and bake it for an hour. Take the pie out and realise, at 4 something, my 12-year-old is awake. I tell them both the pie has to cool and I’m going to bed. Dan asks how long does it have to cool and I say at LEAST an hour and it could be eaten after.

I go in and get comfee, FINALLY fall asleep and at 5:15 Dan comes in.

Dan: Mom?

Me: grumble “what?”

Dan: It’s been an hour….

Me: opening one eye “and?”

Dan: You said an hour and it’d be cool. Can we have pie NOW?

Me: SIGH Danyl, I said it would have to COOL at LEAST an hour before it would be eaten.

Dan: Yeah, and… Come on mom, you said it…

Me: grumble and slip out of bed muttering “Who the hell but me has to make pie at 3AM and WHY?”

Dan in his most innocent and loving voice: You, because you love me

I have REALLY got to teach that child not to be so literal. Or so damned precocious!

Hubby comes out for coffee and asks “What’s with the pie?”


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